24 May 2013

Dear diary,

He asked me, am i important to you?
and then i told him, yes you are. definitely. i mean how could he not see that? it is obvious he is important to me because a lot of events that happen this year, like me shopping for new clothes, new tudung, new scarf, just so that i can look good for him and me going to london a lot of times like its a normal two hour trip that i can just do everyday, i did, just so that i can see him , just so that i can make him happy. those things happen because apparently his happiness matters to me. and i would only want him to be happy and feel safe around me.

i even waited to know whether he is busy or not during june, and wud he have time for me because i dont want to plan anything because maybe he wud want to spend time with me too. i think about all that, and yet he still doubts that is he important to me? oh god, I love him.

He is the craziest dude i have ever met. really crazy. so crazy...and i love him for it. he is really not easy to be with, really really not easy but underneath all that, he is....so lovable, so passionate, so kind, sweet and gentle...he puts up an act, a mask to protect himself, but underneath that there is a guy that is just so special. when i fell for him, i did not fall for his good looks, or his charm, because that is not d first thing that stayed strong in my mind. i fell for him because he is annoying, i fell for him because he is crazy, its like d little things he has, d manja, d merajuk, d menggatal part of him( he just loves d attention from lots of girls) goddd, he is just crazy. and underneath all that, there is a guy who is so protective....so considerate, so loving...i would wana write this in my diary because this is supposed to be more personal, but typing is faster and there is just so much emotion in my heart right now that only Allah knows how i feel inside.
May this will lead somewhere.... truly i pray that it would.... amin.... ya Allah on this blessed day, bless his words, bless our words of love ya Allah and let it be for Your sake ya Allah... let it be so that it would lead towards having your rahmat n barakah ya Rab...amin....